40 calories

I like people's reactions.
I hate sex.
Completely.
I hate being touched and being exposed it feels disgusting.
But I LOVE other people's reactions to being touched.
Julia likes being touched we will leave it at that.
She's a sweet heart and I feel like an asshole.
I don't love her and I know I won't.
But I'm going to stay with her probably until she leaves for college(if she doesn't take a year off) or when I leave for college. That's a year or two.
Eventually I'll have to tell Dad we're together.
I wonder if we'll go to prom together this year :D
I'm going to be her cute little THIN girl friend.
I'm going to continue smoking.
I know she won't like it.
I am going to get better at art and I'll be fine.
Not good.
Not okay.
But FINE.
I will be no more that 80 lbs when I start college(if the world doesn't end before that ahahahaha no.)
I will pretend I'm not dead inside for two more years.
I will be thin.
I will probably not survive but whatever.
<3 Stay strong all those who read this shit
CHEERS