Another post.
But so far(and I don't know if this is it for you guys) but a lot of the people on my reading list and tumblr dash have been talking about telling a therapist about some type of sexual abuse that took place?
And I just figure if I hadn't said anything about it I should.
I live in Ohio and the laws are different for all the states but
I was completely misled when I heard about the laws on 'reporting' sexual abuse.
In therapy you are usually told everything stays in this room EXCEPT:
1. if you are being abused(CURRENTLY)
2. if you are abusing someone who cannot defend themselves(elderly/animals/small children, and I think in major cases basically if you are abusing ANYONE)
3. if you are homicidal
4. if you are actively suicidal(some therapists/psychologists get their degrees out of the toilet mind you)
Circumstance number one is incredibly important in this case.
If you are currently being abused I advise you to TELL SOMEONE.
Especially a figure such as a therapist or you know someone of legal stature.
Things might happen to change your living situation and it could possibly be pretty scary and you might have to face whether or not to pursue a court case but the outcome will most likely(there are horror stories but there is with everything) be better than the horrific abuse you are facing now.
Now when it comes to sexual abuse cases in which you are not currently being abused you need to know something else.
If you live with your offender and you state this even if you are not currently being abused,
that person could be(depending on the circumstances and whether or not they seem 'threatening') under Megan's Law have files charged against them and be placed under the sex offenders registry.
And your living arrangements might change.
This isn't particularly a bad thing depending on your particular circumstances.
But I feel as though I should make this post for people like myself who have suffered from years of sexual abuse and not only still encounter their abuser but are living with them and have to interact with them daily.
I could not tell my psychologist who my abuser was for this specific reason.
My psychologist also suggested(by this I mean he took my Dad into a session one day and said basically "hey why don't you tell him!" without really asking me about it- mind you some people don't get their psychology degrees from the sewer) I tell my parents about this abuse.
So now my Dad looks at me as though I'm fragile which is weird but eventually he'll get over it.
And that is MY Dad. That doesn't mean that if you tell your parents they will regard you in any way differently than they do.
Anyways yes you should probably not be stupid like me( not that I'm saying everyone who DOESN'T is stupid) and look up your state or providence's laws on sexual abuse/sex offenders before you talk to anyone.
I myself was going to tell my therapist who had abused me when my mother brought up the fact that hey maybe that would be a very fucking horrible for other parties*.
Anyways yes this has been a PSA of sorts.
Yeah sure.
*NOT THAT YOU SHOULD EVER CONSIDER ANYONE ELSE OR FEEL OBLIGATED TO PROTECT YOUR ABUSER. This is my case. Which is not your case. Which it may in fact benefit YOUR case to tell who the person/piece of shit is who ever dare motherfucking hurt you like that. I'd kill them for you if I was ignorant and didn't realize that maybe some of these sack of dicks may actually be family members or important people in your lives!
Well I'm lonely like you're lonely but only cause it's thrown me like it's thrown you I don't own you, and my darling you don't own me. It's kicking and it's yelling and it's bruising and it's swelling. But the writing is on the wall and we both know what it's been telling us to do. Well I'm crying and you're crying into silent salty lakes. The road has turned to ice and we haven't any breaks, so while the wall keeps getting closer I fear it's too late not to break our hearts.
Huni, this was a very well written post and I hope it helped someone in some way as I am sure it did.
ReplyDeleteNot to sound like I am joining a club or anything but I too was abused by a family member, and I know that as a child if I had told anyone they would be OBLIGATED to act on my behalf. It is also relevant what age you are. In the UK under 18s are considered "minors" however you are legally able to have sex when you are 16.. thus anyone under 16 and being abused, if you tell someone they are required by law to involve the police and child protection agencies. With other types of abuse, if you are under 18 they still deem you as a minor, and to be honest the court can deem an individual to not have the capacity to make certain decisions when the court thinks it is in the individuals best interests in regards to welfare to do so. So even if you dont want them to do something, if you are under 18 THEY WILL.
For some crazy reason I protected mine too, I didnt want to cause trouble etc and that was something I felt strongly about even when I was 7 years old, up until well now really.
Crazy world we live in huh.
Much love x