Losing

Lost a follower.
Thought I'd lose more.
You guys are fucking lovely you know that?
I lost 28lbs.
Fuck.
Isn't that amazing?
I mean I have so much more to lose but since I've started I've lost that much.
I can't get over it.
I don't feel good about myself but I'm okay with myself.
I'm not going to eat but I will let myself tomorrow.
Dad made banana bread.
I'll let myself just enjoy the smell and won't tell myself it's disgusting and I'm too fat for it.
If I want a piece tomorrow I can have it.
Only one.
I'm semi proud.
I can do better.
I am so sick.
I'm not even going to lie to myself anymore this is sick.
I look in the mirror and I see what I'm doing.
Not me getting thinner but the lack of sleep.
The deep purpling rings are forming around my eyes.
I get paler and paler as each day passes.
I'm going to look see through one of these days.
My hair looks healthy now but I lose more and more of it every day.
In about three months I'm going to start losing huge clumps.
My nails are blue.
My teeth hurt.
I get severe chest pains and vertigo.
I have yet to pass out so that's a plus.
I'm just tired.
<3 anyways.
Stay strong
and for those of you who still care
I LOVE YOU
CHEERS